"We need 2 genders so we can know your genital situation"
Dude some people have earlobes that attach to the face and some have ones that hang off a lil but we didnt create weird ass labels based around that
honestly if you dont have a guinea pig youre missing out
INFJ: Mystical being
ESTP: Insensitive idiot
INTP: Machine #2
ISFJ: Boring #2
ENTP: Fun idiot
ISTJ: Boring and a machine. Amazing.
ENFP: Manic pixie dream girl
ISFP: Baby animals that just roll around without doing anything
ENTJ: Successful robot
ISTP: A wisp of wind with no personality
ENFJ: Tiny, harmless balls of happiness
• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it.
• Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad.
• CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL
• Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel.
• Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there.
• Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover.
• Get clear ice cubes by boiling water before freezing it
• Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick.
• If you accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it.
• If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria.
• Make bug bites stop itching with a banana peel.
• Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas.
• Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the http:// with https://
• Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, print it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking.
• Pick a flavor of gum you don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test.
• Place a piece of bread in a container with your homemade cookies and they will stay soft.
• Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster.
• Put toothpaste on a pimple and cover it with a bandaid overnight. It will dry out.
• Practice fake smiling in the mirror every day before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier.
• Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, you won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and you won’t either.
• Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom to steam it flat.
• The night before, place things you don’t want to forget the next morning on top of your shoes.
• Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing.
• When cleaning windows use newspapers or coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks.
• When microwaving bread products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your bread for going spongy.
• When you move into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on facebook (privately if preferred) so you can use the reference date as proof you didn’t do it.
• When searching plane tickets online delete your cookies prior, prices go up when you visit a site multiple times.
a man named Walter Summerford was struck by lightning 3 times in his life. After his death, his gravestone was also struck.
fuck this guy in particular. even after death, fuck him.
*panics but in a super chill & casual way*
don’t underestimate me. i’ll wear sweaters in the summer. i’ll eat like eighteen gallons of ice cream in the winter. fuck the temperature. i don’t give a fuck
Girls → A 4-hour playlist which includes upbeat, slow, and cover songs all focusing on girls who crush on girls, girls who love girls, girls who have had their hearts broken by girls, and other lesbian things.
i. Jenny – Lily Sevin | ii. I Like Girls – Monica Raymund | iii. Closer – Tegan and Sara | iv. She Keeps Me Warm – Mary Lambert | v. The Only Exception – Paramore | vi. Accidently in Love [cover] | vii. She Looks So Perfect [cover] | viii. Sex – Lauren Aquilina | ix. Underneath a Beating Heart – Rosi Golan | x. Rude - Kina Grannis | xi. Hey There Delilah – Jasmine Thompson | xii. I Do Adore – Mindy Gledhill | xiii. Do I Wanna Know – MS MR | xiv. Electric Feel – Katy Perry | xv. Stubborn Love – Ciara Catalla | xvi. I Miss You – Lauren Bonnell | xvii. Tell Her You Love Her - Echosmith | xviii. Get Lucky (ft. Tanika) – Naughty Boy | xix. Kiss is on My List – The Bird and the Bee | xx. Come and Get It – Jamie Dee | xxi. Sophia – Laura Marling | xxii. Valerie [cover] | xxiii. The Girl – Emma Taylor | xxiv. Sweater Weather – Kina Grannis | xxv. Riptide – Sarah Close | xxvi. Everybody – Ingrid Michaelson | xxvii. R U Mine? – Charlotte Williams | xxviii. Kiss on My List – The Bird and the Bee | xxix. Addicted to You – Avicii | xxx. Cupid’s Chokehold – Shannon Saunders | xxxi. I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance – Kate Nash | xxxii. Stay With Me – Madilyn Bailey | xxxiii. Love Love Love – Of Monsters and Men | xxxiv. Laughter Lines [cover] | xxxv. Teenage Dirtbag – Mary Lambert | xxxvi. 2 Atoms in a Molecule [cover] | xxxvii. Let Her Go – Jasmine Thompson | xxxviii. Creep – Monica Raymund | xxxix. All of Me [cover] | xl. Everybody Talks – Maddie and Julia | xli. Girlfriend – Icona Pop | xlii. Little Numbers – BOY | xliii. In Your Arms – Kina Grannis | xliv. Losing My Religion – Ceyda Tokgoz | xlv. Can’t Help Falling in Love – Ingrid Michaelson | xlvi. I Choose You – Sara Barielles | xlvii. I Wouldn’t Mind – He is We | xlviii. Girl – Daisy Nicole Clark | xlix. Girls – The 1975 | l. Chocolate [cover] | li. Can’t Stand It [cover] | lii. Counting Stars – Angel Haze | liii. Teenage Kicks [cover] | liv. Girls – Beatrice Eli | lv. I Didn’t Just Kiss Her – Jen Foster | lvi. Tattooed Heart – Ariana Grande | lvii. Fireproof [cover] | lviii. A Part of Me – Kayleigh Lazzara | lix. Bloom – Nikki Melcher | lx. Anyone Else But You [cover] | lxi. Toxic – Jayme Dee | lxii. Say You Like Me [cover] | lxiii. Hold On We’re Going Home – Pia Mia | lxiv. Baby Blue Eyes [cover] | lxv. Photograph – Laura Rocca | lxvi. Back to Life – Dresses | lxvii. Anchor – Mindy Gledhill | lxviii. She’s So High Above Me – Alison Tusik | lxix. You And I – Ingrid Michaelson | lxx. Love is Easy [cover] | lxxi. Sunset – Ka Lia Lang | lxxii. You Always Make Me Smile [cover] | lxxiii. You Make Me Happy – Lindsey Ray | lxxiv. Crimson and Clover – Alison Tusik | lxxv. Hot Venom – [cover] | lxxvi. Merry Happy – Kate Nash | lxxvii. Us – Regina Spektor | lxxviii. Flowers In Your Hair – Natalie Bart